Short Funny Status
6 Peg Loading .. :D
Save water drink beer.
Life is Short - Chat Fast!
Hey there whatsapp is using me.
Funny Status for Whatsapp Facebook
How can i miss something i never had?
At least mosquito's are attracted to me.
I'm not lazy, I'm on energy saving mode.
If life gives you lemons, just add vodka.
Best Funny Status
Funny Status Quotes for Whatsapp Facebook
C.L.A.S.S- come late and start sleeping :)
TODAY has been cencelled. Go back to BED :)
I love my job only when I'm on vacation.....
Never make eye contact while eating a banana.
I wake up when I cant hold my pee in any longer.
I only need 3 things in life: Food, Wifi, Sleep :)
Everything funnier when your supposed to be quiet..
GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything.
Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.
New Funny Status 2016
People call me mike .. You can call me tonight.. :p
God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me :P
God is really creative, I mean.. just look at me! :)
Life is too short smile while you still have teeth...
My study period = 15 minutes. My break time = 3 hours.
The only thing I gained so far in THIS YEAR is weight :)
Faces YOU Make ON The Toilet lol (o_o) (>_<) (0_0) (^_^)
I want someone to look at me the way I look at cupcakes!!
Friends are forever, until they get in a relationship!! :P
Funny Status In English
I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them :)
I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice :)
We are WTF generation .... WhatsApp, Twitter and Facebook :D
It's been 70+ years, Tom. You're never going to eat Jerry :)
Everything is 10x funnier when you are not supposed to laugh.
I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone. :)
Who needs television when there is so much drama on Facebook.
You can never buy Love....But still you have to pay for it ..
Mosquitos are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.
I live in a world of fantasy, so keep your reality away from me!
I wonder what happens when doctor's wife eats an apple a day. :)
Latest Funny Status
All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.
If school has taught us anything, it's texting without looking :)
Whoever says "Good Morning" on Monday's deserves to get slapped :)
Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.
If College has taught us anything, it's texting without looking :)
Decided to burn lots of calories today so I set a fat kid on fire.
I hate fake people. You know what I'm talking about. Mannequins. :D
Flirtationship: More than a friendship and less than a relationship.
Having a best friend with the same mental disorder is a blessing. LOL
I'm Jealous Of My Parents... I'll Never Have A Kid As Cool As Theirs!
I don't usually sleep enough, but when I do, it's still not enough ;)
Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up. :D
Funny Status For Whatsapp
Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat.
I've had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. :)
Don't kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.
The most powerful words other than I LOVE YOU is "Salary is Credited" :)
Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs. send him to KFC.
When I'm a Pedestrian I Hate cars.. When I'm Driving I Hate Pedestrians...
I really need 5 hours of Facebook to balance out my 5 minutes of studying.
Today's Relationships: You can touch each other but not each others phones.
Did anyone else notice the sound if you click the like button on my status?
I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.
Laughing at your own texts before you send them because you are so damn funny.
Top Funny Status
My bed is always extra comfortable when I need to get out of it in the morning.
My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. lol
Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software...it's called #Monday, please fix it
My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. lolz
Checking your symptoms on Google and accepting that fact that you're going to die.
Always wear cute pajamas to bed you'll never know who you will meet in your dreams.
A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.
Girls use photoshop to look beautiful.. Boys use photoshop to show their creativity.
If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, nobody else wanted them either :)
If you are going to speak bad things about me on my back, come to me. I'll tell you more.
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Fact: Phone on silent mode- 10 Missed call... Turns volume to loud- Nobody calls all day!!
When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?
When I'm on my death bed, I want my final words to be "I left one million dollars in the...
I am sure I have a defective iPhone, I keep pressing the home button and I'm still at work.
Dear Lord, all I ask for a chance to prove that winning the lottery won't make a bad person.
My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death..!!
People who exercise live longer, but what's the point when those extra years are spent at gym.
I Like to study.. Arithmetic - NO ... world history - NO .... chemistry - NO .... GIRLS - YES!!!
My father always told me, 'Find a job you love and you'll never have to work a day in your life.
Laugh Status For Whatsapp
Some people should have multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
If time does not wait for you, don't worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life.
There's like 7 billion people in this world and no one wants to date me. I hate this world ... huh
In Modern Politics, Even The Leader Of The Free World Needs Help From The Sultan Of Facebookistan!!!
Here my dad comes on whatsapp... From now on my status would be '***no status***' or just a smiley...
It may look like I'm deep in thought, but 99% of the time I'm just thinking about what food to eat later.
Restaurant Advertisement: We serve food as HOT as your neighbour's wife; And beer as COLD as your own. :)
A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.
Wrestling is obviously fake. Why would two people fight over a belt when neither of them are wearing pants?
Good Status For Whatsapp
When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.
When a woman says WHAT? Its not because she didn't hear you. She's giving you a chance to change what you said.
Is there anything more awkward than when you are singing along to a song on youtube and the music stops loading.
Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown male child who can not be handled by his parents anymore.
One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and is too stubborn to ask for directions :)
In bed, it's 6AM you close your eyes for 5 minutes, it's 7:45. At school it's 1:30, close your eyes for 5 minutes, it's 1:31
Boys, if you don't look like calvin klein models, don't expect us to look like victoria secrets angels. (From All Bachelor Girls Association) :)
Years of education, solving tough problems, handling complex issues, yet we take a while standing before glass doors thinking whether to Push or Pull.
I am not addicted to WHATS APP. I only use it when I have time ....... lunch time, break time, bed time, this time, that time, any time, all the time. :)
Tag:- Funny Status, New Funny Status 2016, Best Funny Status, Latest Funny Status, New Funny Quotes 2016, Latest Funny Quotes.
Hello, my name is Jack Sparrow. I'm a 50 year old self-employed Pirate from the Caribbean.
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